brother Pacer's message hit me, super hard.
he said: look at me. i didnt dare to. it's difficult to look at him without losing it.
i stared at my Bible. everything hit spot on.

at the altar call, i very much wanted to go up. but i didnt dare to. foolish me. went up anyway. was going to CRY.
it was so applicable to me. first love. cindy just spoke to me like a few weeks ago about first love.

burn it deep, within my soul. new zeal and fire oh Lord..

i agree though, the altar call was really short.and at the end i was like. uh, it's over?
and see. everything works in His timing.
accepting my hair. aha.

He's standing at your heart's door, knocking. [thump thump thump] will you open?

i like the knocking part.
i like brother Pacer's preaching. not that i dun like bro Sam's preaching but brother Pacer's sermons are powerful.

heard his cliche Friendster testimonials? "like father like son.."

and Dion kor came back today. woah. miss him so much. tt makes three people i miss. though i see them everyweek [two of them] and i can see that God is really evident in his life. the way he expresses his love to God, it simply melts me and wakes me up. the bold way he is declaring that Jesus is indeed the Messiah, the Risen One.
i feel so uplifted when i see people worshipping Him with all their hearts, minds, soul and strength. =)

btw Grace: i think you've influenced me to type, with all the appropriate captisalising and punctuation. aha.

zonkedd.

cell's turning mad. im serious.

a small discussion [okay NOT small, but a simple one] about the book of James . and it sparked off a string of 'lectures' about problems in cellgroup. yes, we should try and correct those but it came out way too strong. maybe im just weak.

i do mean it, i think he got carried away and just shooted off everything tt was mounting up within him.

>out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks.

and it was just a discussion about James!! hecK.
i couldnt wait to go speedlight. though i felt really paiseh leaving so early every week. it seems so impolite .

arggh. im really sorry everytime you type dingdong you see smth negative.

im tired, really tired . i can't wait for AFC and usher retreat.

i've this tinY spot on my thumb where some hair was stuck there. argh. it hurts.

I CHOPPED MY HAIR. damn short. arggh. stupid hairdresser! ):
SO NOW IT'S SUPER DUPER SHORTTTTT. argh! it took me 51415451801841501485415124518412151745mths to grow itttttt. darn.

okayy stop it sheryl.


got scolded, again. i wish i pay more attention to what i do. tsk.
i hate being accountable to like, every being on this earth. :( [took one min to type the sad face, keep typing smiley face wadswrongwithme]
sian .

it sucks getting scolded lah seriously. and it sucks even more when you cant defend yourself, AT ALL. tt's wad happened.
i regret going for MS today. i went for the sake of going, it's not true at all. i feel like such a faker . i wasnt in the mood, AT ALL. i was stoning throughout the service, then when it was the testimony part i went downstairs with nic to get some fresh air, away from the cold.

and that's wrong?!
so what, you go downstairs with a guy during a service means that you're an item with him?!
crap. so next time i shall go with a GIRL.

i dont hate/dislike the person who scolded me but rather, the reason. it's kinda crappy dont you think. cant you have a good friend who is a guy? why cant you?!

wont say who was the one who lectured me .
argh.


checkup was horrible. THREE hours. i shouldnt be, but im kind OF disappointed with God. slap me. the deg remains the same with op a breath away.
went to msia to eat after that. yum. chilli has captivated my tastebuds.

now playing: salvation is here
now doing: waiting for nicholas to reply my msg, which btw, he always take forever.
now feeling: unjustified and depressed. [stupid sister]

TO GRACE: please change ur layout to the nice black one!!.. =/ i cnt read your previous posttttssss.
andandand. thanks for the shoutout.(: you uh, had one paragraph about me!.. lol.

TO SAMUEL: i gotta agree with grace. gosh your social skills are good. i know you for barely a monTh. and now im telling you everything that makes sheryl. HAHHAHA.

argh. im sick of the game of charade

TO GRACE again: i borrowed a book with poetry essays and writings. mhmm.sounds nice. XD

**
TEN FIRSTS
First Best Friend(s): uh, huimin..... i cnt really remember ahha.
First Screen Name: sherylyhc. it's dumb, i know.
First Pet: fishys.
First Piercing: p3, ears.
First School: twinkle stars childcare i think
First CD: uhh, cnt remember .
First Car: hmmm. the BUS. hahah
First Stuffed Animal: cnt remember too. hahah stm.
First Hp:nokia 8250
First Crush: uhh. i think it's around p4-5 . lol

NINE LASTS
Last Alcoholic Beverage: nah.
Last Car Ride: uh.. concert dae.
Last Movie Seen: hmm. i think it's MAID.
Last Phone Call: samuel ? no. mhmm.. i cnt remember loh. i hardly call. i rather MSN. heehee
Last CD Played: CROSS . [tt was like a week ago, i usually use WMP's library instead]
Last Bubble Bath: nahh.
Last Time You Cried: tues, some form of water from my eyes seeped out. just a little.
Last Online: Now.[duh!]
Last Meal: Breakfast

EIGHT HAVE YOU EVERS
1. Have you ever dated one of your best friends: HAHA no.
2. Have you ever been arrested: Nope.
3. Have you ever skinny dipped: Uh, has anyone in Singapore skinny-dipped before?
4. Have you ever been on TV: Yeah
5. Have you ever kissed someone and then regretted it: uh. i dun think so.XD and the only ppl i kiss was my mum and dad when i was young
6. Have you ever cheated: who never?
7. Have you ever spent more than 5 hours online: Yeah. Of course.
8. Have you ever cried yourself to sleep: sort of. crying inside. cnt cry out, sis' sleeping.

SEVEN THINGS YOU'RE WEARING
1. watch
2. specs
3. ear sticks.
4. shirt
5. my favourite berms. XD
6. hairband
7. undergarments. HAHAHA.

SIX THINGS YOU'VE DONE TODAY
1. breathe
2. changed my hp profile name
3. ate
4. wish i can talk to sam/grace
5. brush my teeth
6. moan and groan and get into a bad mood.

FIVE SIX FAVORITE THINGS
1.my pink berms.
2. My computer. I need it, my contact to the outside world, ok.
3. my direction to life; the bible!
4. my books.
5. uh, my bed. AHAHA
6. my camera!! [not mine actually ahaha]

soon to be:
my cg and class shirt!

FOUR PEOPLE YOU CAN TELL [ALMOST] ANYTHING TO
1. GOD, though He isn't really a person.
2. grace
3.samuel
4. nicholas, lingquan, cindy.

THREE CHOICES
1. black.
2. Cold or hot: cold always.
3. Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate, always.

TWO THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE
1. serve! [GOD]
2. Live life to the fullest (and yes, this includes everything! Good, now I don't have to pick out two things from so many)

ONE THING YOU REGRET
1. shooting my mouth off. argh.
**

I WANT TO SERVE IN MS. ! .. argh.

there is a place in Your heart that im longing to find
wont You show me
there is a place i know i can run to and hide
wont You show me

show me, show me
show me Your heart




Lord wont You show me?

freak. the checkup's on friday . argh .



mhmm.
i dont know what to say.

[grace: if you're dying to know who's THE PERSON, please scroll down and spot a name other than grace, samuel, vanessa, shuhua, alvin, sheryl, miss yee and wayne. mhmm]

the type of guys whom im really scared of;
- super shy .
- cos you dont know what to say to them, you might be like contribuiting to his volcano eruption in time to come.
- worse, you might be the ONE who will cause the eruption .

second type ;
really outgoing and stuff. but you dont know when he's serious and when he's not.
[that person is so painfully obvious..]

yea. sniffs- grace, i hope i didnt do smth wrong.








I HATE THE FACT THAT IM ONLY THIRTEEN .
yeayea, im only thirteeen. i know . i know .

today's happiness seem momentarily.

im happy for a second and the next five secs i'll be sad.
mainly sad.


i cant shake of this feeling of inferiority. why ?


YES I KNOW IM ONLY THIRTEEN.
but so what if im... thirteen?
mhmm.

happy birthday my friend.

happy birthday sheryl.



it's 12.04am.

im not feeling happy. ):
one year ago it was like this, too.

):



i hate to be dragged into fights or being in the midst of them .
i feel helpless, i dont know wad to do or say.


me: hope seems far away.
gracE: at least it's still somewhere .



let the first drop of water fall from my eyes .

think speedlight camp o4 - my utmost for His highest 2




i wonder if i'll be as brave as the girl in one of the prayer booth's newspaper clippings.
the one who was shot for her faith.

ARGH.

i hate myselfff. ):

1. for messing ushering tday up
2. for being such a lousy birthday girl.

[apologies to grace sam and vanessa]

--

dearest lingquan,

i got the message.

sheryl.

--

that was totally random. bah.
and heck.

shus asked me to usher right
van and alvin asked me to usher left
wayne asked me to usher left and/or right.

who am i to listen to ?!
so it was in a mess.messmess.

den okay, to those three people agn.
THANKS LOADS. i feel so loved.
mhmm. yeah. i feel damn paiseh haha.



and then. to all who wished me happy birthday though you wont read this.
thanks loads too.

): im depressed.


wanted to fall on my knees and pray during praise and worship but i

i didnt [you'll know what to do if you're smart]

i feel so burdenedd. and i miss leading worship.
i dun feel good leading in GMs though. cos i feel so.. small.

and yes grace, HE makes me feel inferior too. ):
one of the reasons why i dun feel good leading in GMs.
and i hate the feeling of inferiority.


im dreading full dress tml.
i hope ms yee wont kill me for the crumpled dress.
i wish i can fit into my stupid gown.

if only i didnt eat so much.



yeah.





i miss leading in cg though.
sometimes i wonder why i do so much.

what if..
what i experienced on saturday was just an illusion.


i dont want to walk away from the specialist centre feeling disappointed

sheryl.
it's all crap . get it?

you dont even pray.
how do you expect you'll be well?


heck.
i dowan third dec to come.








what if i need surgery.

hi. i decided to update this more often. and change the layout. it's getting.. depressing

wait. since 28november 2003, when has this place been, happy?
no day. hurrhurr.

alrites. i survived like SIXTEEN HOURS of hour in TWO days. congrat me man. and it really works when you start AND end the day with a word of prayer. we didnt ytd and it was horrible. and yet today we did and it turned out well.. even fun! =D

did i mention, omgosh. hihs guys are like super shuai can! opps. dun tell anyone k. haahaa.
so schoolgirl-ish. lol.
and sgss guys are so... goodness. no comments. haha have lah, but dowan sae. =p

and that was the reason why i decided to revive this blog. haaha!
finally smth happy yea. =/

i've sorta got over the speedlight choir thing. i hope it doesnt pop up agn during the next ministy recuitment. bah. i love the speeeeeedlight usherrring ministttttryyy man. we rawkk. =DDD

heh heh. i love samuel and grace too.
another two persons who can come here when they're bored and see what i cant say in the other blog. [like hihs guys being shuai.. HAHHAA]

and i love audrey too! it's so funn teasing her and everything.. she dun get angry de lorh! heehee. i feel so meaN. ;p

singout. in how many days? six.

me?
im just another incohorent girl on the face on the earth. singing's my passion, but i do badly at it.
and it doesnt help that some people stress that point to me too. it redundant, cos i already know it.
trying to live for God alone. still trying.

you'll find out who sheryl really is here.

wait a minute.
you dont even need to know me.

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